It's a miracle!

So I got a call back this morning on one of the resumes I sent out. Yay! It's with a technology company doing half the work I do now, at about $2 an hour more! I guess I shouldn't get too excited though because I went through about 100 interviews before I got the job I'm currently in. So even if they make me a not so great offer, I can use that for leverage with my current boss for him to pay me more money. I can sell myself to the highest bidder......sounds like a plan!

I'm supposed to fence in Columbia, SC this weekend for the Sectional Championships. I'll probably get my butt kicked, but I'm sure it will give me the ability to practice and train and see my fat ass on video again. I guess the most depressing part is that so many of my teammates are so awesome, which is good, but they all come home with three and four medals from one tournament. I can't even seem to make the top ten! It's just depressing to be the person who has been fencing the longest, but has the least amount of talent. Ugh.

Anyway, I have one final practice tonight to get things together, and then it's off to the races. Wish me luck, and I'm sure I'll update when I'm done.

Tonight's practice

I know...I already blogged today, but I thought I would recap my fencing practice for anyone who might read.

My coach/husband filmed all of my bouts from the tournament on Sunday, so after doing some drills we went to watch and critique them. Boy does my ass look fat!!!! Why didn't anyone tell me?!?!?!?! I'm sure the stupid white knickers don't help at all. But I digress....other than looking fat, I had some really good points this weekend. I also did some stupid things, but it all didn't look nearly as horrible as I thought.

Gotta lose some weight....

Ugh.....cold

Why on earth is it this cold in friggin' April! I live in North Carolina for God's sake! The high is only 60 today, and it's gray and yucky. Luckily, we're supposed to get rain later. I like rain. Thunderstorms are better though.

Another crappy day at work....yay! I kind of decided that I should only have to work as hard as they pay me for. I mean, if they can't pay me what I'm worth, and they give the other stupid woman ("my equal") so much more money than me, than I just won't work so hard to impress anyone. What's the point if it isn't going to get me anywhere?

Hey...I just have to say...I bought a nes CD this weekend, and it has absolutely affected me. Go get "Wreck of the Day" by Anna Nalick. It's pretty friggin' awesome. Anyone reading this who actually knows me, knows that I don't respect many musicians, and it's an absolute REQUIREMENT for them to at least write their own songs, as well as sound good live, so here's a new addition to my favs list. Check her out! But then again, maybe it's a chick thing. The best song (in my opinion of course) is "Consider This", track 11.

So anyway, I guess that's all for today. I guess I need to tell more people about this thing so I get comments. Yay.

So...yeah

I decided to start a blog. I'm not really even sure why. My life isn't even all that interesting. I used to keep one on fencing.net, but it was really more of a training journal, and the stupid annoying teenagers there got on my nerves.

But I digress..... I used to write a lot in high school and college. I even won an award in college for an essay I wrote. Maybe someday I'll post it on here. But anyway, at some point I just kind of lost my way. I used to be into music (I have a degree in it for pete's sake), and I used to draw and write, and all sorts of that creative stuff, but I just kind of....stopped. A lot of things have changed about me in the past five or so years. I'm not sure all of them were for the positive either. So, in my attempt to re-find myself, I'm here....creating a blog.

You see....I've been in kind of a bad way lately. I'm just so unhappy with...well... everythiong, that I'm not sure what to do to fix it. So I guess writing it down is a good start.

Don't get me wrong, I don't want this to be a "pity Karen fest" or anything, but I need to get some of this shit out. My job sucks. I work with this woman who is an absolute bitch. She completely fabricates things to make me look bad, and I think my boss buys most of it. It sucks. To make things worse, she makes almost twice what I do, for doing half the amount of work. I need to find a different job.

My marriage is....well....not the greatest. Don't get me wrong, I'm not beaten or anything, but my husband isn't exzactly very attentive. Enough about that though.

Then there's the fencing thing. I've been fencing for about 6 years now, but still just absolutely horrible at it. I used to be pretty good, but I'm not sure what happened. It's like I've been in this horrible downward spiral for the past couple of years, just getting worse and worse. It's really depressing when you get your ass consistently kicked by 15 year olds.

But anyway, enough bitching for now. Until next time.....